Awards Season Weirdness

1) why are celebrities back lashing so hardcore against the mani cam?? I don’t understand. I enjoy seeing the manicures, and, yes, it’s frivolous, but so is absolutely the entire red carpet reporting, and, frankly, the awards season in its entirety. Why suddenly is this one thing being picked on? Manicures = the straw that broke the camels back?! Really?! I think that’s bizarre. Especially considering that it is one little way that the people at home can maybe try to emulate celebrity style without breaking the bank.

2) the drama about people getting snubbed. Jennifer Aniston got snubbed …oh so terrible. I know she thinks she deserves an Oscar because she didn’t wear makeup in one freaking movie and because Sandra Bullock has an Oscar but give me a freaking break. Also, Selma. Getting nominated for best picture at the Oscars is not getting snubbed. Since when is that a snub?? I don’t understand how there’s an assumption that if you make a movie about important subject matter, that everyone should give it praise and awards regardless of if it is good or groundbreaking cinema. Good stories don’t equal good movies. Good stories don’t equal Oscar.

3) Meryl Streep. I know that the Oscars are obsessed with Meryl Streep but there was nothing about her Into The Woods role that was Oscar worthy. Sorry.

Autocorrect capitalizes God

Ohhh, picking sides, autocorrect. I see you.

In fifth grade I corrected my Jewish teacher in front of the whole class when she wrote the word “God” on the chalkboard without a capital “g” and I got in trouble for being rude and for being wrong. Then I tattletaled on the teacher to my parents that she wasn’t capitalizing properly and I think we all had to sit down and have a biiiig talk about it. I thought it was blasphemous to uncapitalize it, not because I was a grammar czar but because that’s what I’d been taught in Sunday school. Turns out that’s mainly a Christian thing. Or it was for my church anyways (I’ve met several people who’ve grown up in church through the years and had never heard of this “rule”).

What’s the point? The point is that the capitalization of the word is certainly not a universal truth. And yet autocorrect thinks it is. Now that I’m pretty much an atheist I’m kind of offended that every time I write the word—and this is usually in a swearing or sarcastic context—and it autocorrects it to make me look religious, or at least like I care. Which I don’t. Intentionally. Since fifth grade.

Rant over.

Thoughts?

Zoos, Animal Rights, Pets, Vegetarianism

These are subjects that weigh heavily on my souls. I have witnessed and known much proof that animals of all kinds feel emotions, are thinking beings, etc. and I am therefore increasingly sickened by the idea of eating meat, visiting zoos and even aquariums, and even by owning pets.

I’ve read that for the adopted child, their first emotions and transient experience with their adoptive family are fraught with fear and confusion. Where is my mother? Where is her smell? Where is her heartbeat? Why would the same not be true for that moment when a puppy is taken from its mother and given to even the most loving of families? When I look at my dog, Cliffy, I often feel a sadness that he can’t be with his pack, his brothers and sisters, his mother. It’s the domestication of the species by another species that upsets me. What right do we have to not allow dogs to live as families?

The ivory trade is a sickening business partly because we know just how intelligent and emotional elephants are. It’s basically a business of murder, and though it is internationally banned, its outcome is still highly prized in some cultures. Make that analogy to murder in another species and you’ll see how disgusting it is.

The ivory trade’s ugliness inevitably leads my mind to the ugliness of zoos and circuses, as I begin to think about all of the other grave injustices we as humans have committed to such incredible creatures as elephants. Obviously, zoos and circuses do not partake in the same cruelties, and many zoos, especially of late, actively try to work on animal conservation and preservation of species to counteract the cruelty of circuses historically and currently. But zoos are still inherently a caged atmosphere where animals are unnaturally required to get sustenance from humans. Zoos inherently still involve animals separated from their families. Zoos inherently involve the noise of crowds, the tapping of glass, the general melee of humans on the other side of the fence. Even aquariums have these cruelties if you think about it. I’ve heard of people outraged about the whales and the dolphins in captivity, but what about the penguin and the fish? Aren’t they also in a small, cramped, completely unnatural space for our amusement??

Which ultimately leads me to vegetarianism. I love the taste of lamb, of all cuts of beef, of ham, of the dark meat on a turkey. But when I think about liking the dark meat, I can’t help but assess that essentially I am liking the leg of an animal. And that grosses me out. Upon seeing the HBO movie about Temple Grandin, I was struck by how even cows and basic farm animals have emotions. Cows respond to a hugging feeling, and because of this breakthrough in understanding, machines are devised to calm the cows down through a hugging-like device for the purpose of slaughtering them more easily. For purposes of slaughtering them more easily. For purposes of slaughtering them more easily.

When I was younger, my cousin Bridget had a traumatic event at a pig roast because, obviously, she saw the pig and it horrified her the think that everyone was then going to eat that. She refused to eat it at the party, and refused to eat ham, and her mom used to trick her into eating pork by telling her that it wasn’t pig. I remember everyone laughing at how silly the whole thing was, but I don’t see it as silly now. I see it as as a child being able to discern the emotions of another living being much more succinctly than the adults around her, and being affected by those emotions. It reminds me of how as a child, zoo visits were fun but they were never without a hint of sadness for all of the animals that didn’t have their mommies, that were in cages, that looked lonely and scared (even if that was only my perception). I always felt that, acutely.

And now, I think about having children of my own and about how I will raise them and what I will expose them to. I know that I will have to explain to them what humans have done to elephants, lions, monkeys, dogs, cats, koi, goldfish, etc. I know that I’d like to have a vegetarian household, or at least maybe a grass-fed, free-range household that has an open discussions about where meat comes from.

What do you think?

Divergent

Wow, what a bad movie! And that’s coming from someone who likes a lot of bad movies.

I feel really bad for Kate Winslet because I saw a recent article in which the actress is listed as being known for her work in Titanic and Divergent. That’s really sad. And not true. If anything, I would say Titanic and The Reader, though my favorite movie of hers is Finding Neverland, I think The Reader is more appropriate of a reference for her, since she won an Oscar for it and all.

I also feel really bad for anyone who thought it was a good movie, since it was not.

I also feel bad for the Kravitz girl that bet on the wrong YA franchise. Daddy had it right, sweetheart. Hunger Games is the better pick. Is it weird that there are Kravitz’s in both franchises?? I was weirded out by that.

I also feel bad for myself if there is a sequel because I will watch it (duh) and it will not be good. C’est la vie!

More on Vocal Fry

In case “vocal fry” is unfamiliar terminology to you, here is an education on this terrible speech epidemic:

CBS Sunday Morning video article, from September 12, 2013: here.

Slate.com podcast on “creaky voice”: here.

May 2014 article from The Atlantic on how vocal fry hurts in job interviews: here.

Several articles on vocal fry from Huffington Post: here.

Time magazine article titled “3 Speech Habits That Are Worse Than Vocal Fry in Job Interviews”: here.

I’m baaack

Stupid autocorrect tried to make that title say “I’m Barack”. Thanks, Obama.

So the blog has been back up and blog-able for about a few weeks now, but with the holidays, I was busy. And then with the holidays over, I was tired. But then something miraculous happened and I was inspired to blog again.

What happened was that I wanted to kill. Not really. But I’m really really annoyed.

Vocal fry.

Vocal fry is what is killing me.

Actually Millenials/ Generation Z is what’s killing me. All of ‘em. Even the ones I like.

I’m sitting in a waiting room at a doctors’ office where I have to remain for the next three hours because I’m going through some testing, and I’m lucky enough to share this time and space with two vocal fry Millenial queens, age about 17. They are so unbelievably annoying and all they’re doing is talking. Well, and playing each other videos. And reading each other texts. And talking on the phone. And complaining about the weather. And reading into a text that just said “ok” for the past fifteen minutes. I have head phones on and it’s not enough, I can still hear their slight whine over Netflix. Netflix, don’t do me like that. Don’t dog me.

Which brings me to a colloquialism that was very familiar to my family, but was recently pointed out to be strange by my husband and my sister’s boyfriend. The phrase: “dog me up”. To us it meant “lay it on me”, “give me some”, “yes please” even. But Todd and Reed were confused. Did it mean “I’ll take a little”? Or perhaps it meant “that’s not cool, brah, of course I don’t want any”. Or “that’s not cool, brah, of course I want some. Why did you even ask?!”

And speaking of colloquialisms, did you know that the phrase was “get down to brass tacks” not “brass tax”. Every day I’m learning.

Oh good, no one is debating what a two letter text means anymore. “OK”. In my humble O.P. I’m pretty sure it means “alright”. I’m pretty sure it isn’t necessarily only used by bitches and therefore doesn’t necessarily only mean “I guess if that’s what you think should happen but I don’t agree”. But that’s just me. I’m not a 17 year old vocal fry machine. And trust me, I am fully capable of reading into things beyond what normal people would think is acceptable, but I tend to stick to old school face-to-face conversation over-reading, and maybe the occasional email. A text that says “ok”?? I don’t want to hear about that!

Ooh goody now they’re watching loud videos again. Is that not bad manners? Are manners not taught anymore? Is that not considered a manner? Jesus take the wheel. I can’t do high schoolers anymore. I am officially old.

Duh! Joni Mitchell is still awesome

Joni Mitchell has been saying for over a decade now that the music industry is awful and is making crap now. I remember reading about it when she was on the cover of Rolling Stone in around 2001 and thinking “she’s so right. and so awesome.” So, fast forward to 2014 and she’s not only still saying that, but she’s also crushing the dreams of Taylor Swift and I have to say I WHOLEHEARTEDLY APPROVE.

Joni won’t let Taylor Swift make/ star in a biopic of her, according to her latest interview with The Sunday Times. Right on. I mean, Taylor Swift as Joni? That’s hilarious. She wishes. That’s a total denigration of the folk music ethos and the talent that Joni honed and crafted for years into her early classic folk and later more experimental albums. I’m so glad that Joni said HELL NO to this poser.

The end.

Through Saturday

- I was considering Having my mail stopped because it was too cold to go out and get junk mail every day. Is this really a minus, or is this genius??
– Therapy this week was about yet again realizing that I am not ready for kids even though I want to be. I know it is many small steps to do something large like recover from depression, but I’m desperate for my life to leap forward in some way.
– Gallbladder? No. Pain in gallbladder region? Mmm yes. My phantom gallbladder is haunting me.
+/- I am reading an awesome nonfiction book called The Baby Thief about Georgia Tann. I’ll get into it later. What’s minus about it is that it is a true story and that is truly terrible.
+ Egg nog ice cream
+ Cute puppies in pinterest
+/- Napping. Naps are inherently good and not evil. But this new psych. drug has me full-on sleeping through three out of six days this week. That’s bad. However I am ridiculously functional and productive when I am actually awake. And I’ve had no nightmares all week as opposed to every fucking night, my unfortunate modus operandi of late. So. Pluses and minuses.
+ My Facebook robin williams note continues to be misconstrued which is frustrating because I worked so hard to craft it. I am not suicidal now. I WAS. I did not write it for pity or comfort, or for notes about how much I am loved, I wrote it to be informative, to let people know that it’s closer to them than they think and it can surprise you who it affects. Maybe people want to say something and they don’t know what to say, so they send encouraging words. It’s frustrating to me because it’s totally missing the point of what I said. Did I already say that? Rant over.
– I told Todd about his surprise Christmas present because I can’t decide on the type of board game I want to make it into and I wanted his input on what he would enjoy. I kept that secret for almost a year, but ruined it four weeks before Christmas?!??? What is wrong with me.
+ the MRI machine that recorded my gallbladder on Saturday had Sirius radio built into it, so I got to listen to literally my favorite Joni Mitchell song, help me, and my favorite bob Seger song, night moves, whilst getting an MRI. Awesome.
+ new movie added to the favorites of all time ever list: About Time. Ugh it was so good! Critics did not appreciate it, but I already knew I hated critics.
+ we went and saw Hunger Games: Mockingjay part 1 on Saturday as part of our Christmas movie gift to each other of movie passes. I kept asking the adorable tween in her pj’s who was sitting next to me what was going on, and she was very obliging. If you haven’t read the books, definitely sit next to a tween girl.

Ridiculous soundtrack.

I’m watching season 10 of Grey’s Anatomy on Netflix and I JUST.CAN’T. with these slow, soulful covers of 80’s songs in every goddamn scene. It is driving me absolutely goddamn crazy. “Like A Virgin” by Amos Lee in Episode 22???? It’s just too goddamn much. And a cover of “Fame” on a show that has Debbie Allen??? Oh, too much. A cover of “Sister Christian”???? I CANNOT HANDLE IT!